• Can't cum

    1410308042
    clarebear1976 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 2
    • Joined: 13 May 2014

    My boyfriend cant cum inside me an we dnt no what to do or try, he can cum with masterbating ect and has no problems getting an erection.anybody have any ideas/tips

    1410342153
    Young and fun95 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2825
    • Joined: 6 Jun 2014

    Sometimes this happens because of mastubation, the guy gets used to the pressure Nd sensation that nothing else works. Try him stopping mastubating for a couple of weeks.

    1410343467
    DavidB1986 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2231
    • Joined: 11 Feb 2009

    I agree with Y&F - it sounds like a case of 'death grip' - which isn't a medical condition - it's all a state of mind.

    And it's completely reversible! It takes a bit of time, but you can 'retrain' him so he is able to appreciate stimulation from sex again.

    Get him to refrain from masturbating for a week (you don't touch him either). If he gets an erection during this week, he'll just need to ignore it!

    After a week or so, let him masturbate, but ONLY when his body is ready, not when he is (i.e when he gets an erection without any stimulation via hand) - it has to be 'natural'. Get him to take it slowly, and use a looser grip then he would use to (it's about getting familiar with softer stimulation).

    Get him to try different things - so whether he uses a stroker, or a different position, or different lubes etc - get him to spice up his masturbation routine - so he does something different each time. Within a couple of weeks, he should be more receptive to stimulation during regular sex.

    Key things to remember:

    1. Take it slow

    2. Be gentle!

    3. Let erections develop naturally

    4. Alternate masturbation technique

    5. Use lubricant!

    I hope this helps - good luck!

    1410359260
    Fitnessfreak [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 371
    • Joined: 19 Dec 2011

    Ask him to go on a dry spell for a week or maybe less I start crawling the walls 4-5 days.

    1410360028
    Fun for 2 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 85
    • Joined: 18 Jun 2013

    As he cums easily with masterbation it probs isnt anything physical and likely just a mental thing... kinda like writers block. I think the suggestions about abstinence for a while are a good start, but instead of jumping straight into an expecation that this will lead to him being able to cum during intercourse, how about using the fact that a hand job may get him there as part of the journey? i.e. get him to busting point with a hand job then slip him in for the beautiful moment. Over time perhaps you can both "slip it in" a bit earlier, and earlier, and so on.

    I think just relying on abstinense in its own right is likely to cause more anxiety for the bloke as it gets built up to this big moment that he knows he should (and wants to) deliver on. Play with what you know is working and build in the other elements of intamcy that you both want/like gradually. You will probs both laugh about it in years to come. Biggest advice would be to keep having fun with it and laugh at the stuff you try that simply doesnt work. I know it's easier said than done but from experience the moment the banter a fun escape from the intimacy you find yourself facing something more like work than joy. Good luck. The fact you have asked the question suggests you will both crack it. Would love to know how it goes. :-)

    1410361000
    Khaleesi [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 405
    • Joined: 1 Jun 2012

    Does he mastubate in a particular position all the time? That can also influence his ability to ejaculate in you.

    1410826445
    clarebear1976 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 2
    • Joined: 13 May 2014

    Thanks guys.hes been single 4 few yrs so allhedid was masterbate.we are in a long distance relationship so wen I see him this weekend it will have been 4 weeks an he promises hes not done anyting so fingers crossed!!!!

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.