How inventive are you?

OMG i just watched it! That's some painfull shit! glad i only tried a strong bottle, and only the neck!!

I actually went out n bought a glass toy early this morning (sorry to betray you LH) and I haven't put my clothes back on since!!

yeah - horrible eh?

I've tried bottles up the bum, melon, even tried giving myself an enema with an oil suction gun!  To be honest though - none of which are as good as having sex with the wife. :)

Ladiesman, I hope you're not offended by this but everytime I see your avatar photo it makes me feel very , very nauseous - I realise it's entirely my problem that I have a problem with food used in this way but I am really quite phobic about it. 

It is really upsetting me and stopping me logging in because there's no way for me to block your picture.

Some people are freaked out by balloons or spiders, with me it's food play, luckily it's normally simple to avoid but all this talk of "sploshing" ( I knew it existed but not the terminology)  has affected me.    It's hard enough for me to see a child with a messy face unintentionally but for adults to choose to make a mess with food , it seriously freaks me out!

Sorry,  but I hope you understand that's it's seriously affecting my use of the forums.

Lady Lara wrote:

Ladiesman, I hope you're not offended by this but everytime I see your avatar photo it makes me feel very , very nauseous - I realise it's entirely my problem that I have a problem with food used in this way but I am really quite phobic about it. 

It is really upsetting me and stopping me logging in because there's no way for me to block your picture.

Some people are freaked out by balloons or spiders, with me it's food play, luckily it's normally simple to avoid but all this talk of "sploshing" ( I knew it existed but not the terminology)  has affected me.    It's hard enough for me to see a child with a messy face unintentionally but for adults to choose to make a mess with food , it seriously freaks me out!

Sorry,  but I hope you understand that's it's seriously affecting my use of the forums.

I just wanted to say that I really admire the way you phrased this Lady Lara - you acknowledged your responsibility for your feelings, acknowledged no harmful intent on the part of the other person, and expresed yourself in terms of your feelings and your responses as separate from the other person.  Personally I consider your message to be entirely respectful whilst at the same time expressing your needs clearly.

I think this kind of phrasing represents a world of difference in the best possible way to the way you used to express yourself when you first joined these forums.

I hope you can accept my admiration in the way I intended it?  Thank you for trying, I really think they're paying off, and I really think more than just me will appreciate your efforts.

Best regards,

Lubyanka.  :)

ps:  I also wanted to say to Ladiesman that whilst my response to your avatar is nowhere near as profoundly felt as Lady Lara's, I have had some kind of slightly unpleasant feelings about it myself.  Personally, I wouldn't ask you to change it just for me, but I thought it would be helpful both to you and Lady Lara if I added this.

Lady Lara wrote:

Ladiesman, I hope you're not offended by this but everytime I see your avatar photo it makes me feel very , very nauseous - I realise it's entirely my problem that I have a problem with food used in this way but I am really quite phobic about it. 

It is really upsetting me and stopping me logging in because there's no way for me to block your picture.

Some people are freaked out by balloons or spiders, with me it's food play, luckily it's normally simple to avoid but all this talk of "sploshing" ( I knew it existed but not the terminology)  has affected me.    It's hard enough for me to see a child with a messy face unintentionally but for adults to choose to make a mess with food , it seriously freaks me out!

Sorry,  but I hope you understand that's it's seriously affecting my use of the forums.

LOL... Not offended whatsoever.  Sorry that the pic has affected your use of the forums. 

Hope this one is slightly easier on the eyes.

LadiesMan wrote:

LOL... Not offended whatsoever.  Sorry that the pic has affected your use of the forums. 

Hope this one is slightly easier on the eyes.

Thank you very much!  You're very kind, I appreciate it.  :)

ps: Whatever that is, I'm hoping to remain clueless, thank you.  :)

Thank you for being so understanding,  It's an issue I've had for as long as I can remember , how I coped with my daughter's birthday parties I don't know.

and thank you Lubyanka for your eloquent post - I do try and think with logic before I post but I only think in black and white, there is no room in my head for  the many "shades of grey" , I don't do ambivalence, so my opinions are always absolute and I do tend to go with my gut reaction to something. 

I don't mean to offend anybody but sometimes I'm truly disturbed by certain things, that's not just limited to sexual practices either.

Lady Lara wrote:

and thank you Lubyanka for your eloquent post - I do try and think with logic before I post but I only think in black and white, there is no room in my head for  the many "shades of grey" , I don't do ambivalence, so my opinions are always absolute and I do tend to go with my gut reaction to something.

Perhaps it would help if you consider that the way you expressed yourself in your post was also black and white (if I understand your use of black and white correctly).  There is absolutely no requirement that you like or participate in anything anybody else likes.  The issue here is how you express yourself.  So as long as you acknowledge that your feelings apply to you only, and were not caused by anybody here, you can still feel what you've always felt, and you can still express your feelings if you want to.

The only difference here is recognising that somebody saying they like something is in no way any suggestion, requirement, or enforcement that you feel or do the same, that nobody wants to or even can hurt you here, that there is no threat, and that you're quite safe.  I don't think that's grey at all, I think that's pretty absolute.  Perhaps if you can get into the habit of remembering all that when you experience a strong emotive response, you'll find it easier to phrase your posts respectfully.  I think that's also not grey at all, and pretty absolute.

So maybe it's a matter of perspective.

I hope that helped.  If it didn't, oh well, feel free to ignore me.  :)

Used a squeezy bottle before i knew about douches.

Ill be honest ive tried a hoover just to see how it feel, its nice but too risky thank you very much.
And ive tried homemade stuff but its tiresome, like the pillow humper, sandwich bags, etc. Ive made lube out gel like products (some good some well another story), but yeh its good to be inventive i say

Over the years I've been quite an inventive girl.

A ladyshave (turned the other way)

Handle of a hairbrush (quite small that was years ago)

Handle of a crutch (that was bumpy!)

Carrot (washed and in a condom )

Electric hair clippers (never again too dangerous)

Vibrating (ordinary) toothbrush

Beer Bottle (after someone I fancied had drunk the contents and no they never knew!)

I'm sure there's a couple more but I can't remember em all, a lot of these were quite a few years ago - I hve a sex toy collection now so it keeps me happy. But till I did I was quite inventive!

I found out last night from one of the lads in work that one of the other lads who still works there was caught some years ago with his cock somehow attached to a massive indusrial vibro used for shaking powder out of silos! Fucking hell it must have nearly ripped his bollocks off!

Crazy crazy bastard!

SG69

Being rather poor, I must say, bondage is the easiest thing to be into to get it on the cheap! Belts, random lengths of rope, some elastic bands do a good job for clit and nipple clamps (could also be used as a cock ring? or male genital bondage?) any bit of clothing or fabric can be a blindfold, too much to choose from for gags, and so much more. What ever your imagination takes you to, it can be done!

As for actual sex toy substitutes, I have tried other things and they are just not the same. electric toothbrush is not a good sub. I've used a ribbed handle of the (old) potato masher.. not the same. Though I do enjoy grinding against the duvet cover when masturbating..

I tried a rubber dish glove and some lube the other day, but to be honest it didn't really work.... I think I'm going to have to wait until the wife figures out what I mean by 'egg' (the tenga, of course!)

SEXYGET 69 wrote:

I found out last night from one of the lads in work that one of the other lads who still works there was caught some years ago with his cock somehow attached to a massive indusrial vibro used for shaking powder out of silos! Fucking hell it must have nearly ripped his bollocks off!

Crazy crazy bastard!

SG69

So its not just you who has time for wanking at your work then!

Hmmm. . . .I lways thought our place had a few wankers!

And before you even go there WandA!

I'm not one of them, I hope!

SG69

SEXYGET 69 wrote:

Hmmm. . . .I lways thought our place had a few wankers!

And before you even go there WandA!

I'm not one of them, I hope!

SG69

Only in the literal sense SG!

Lots of rubbing as a child so most of my soft toys earnt the disturbed element in their facial expressions.

Since being with a partner, dressing gown belts for tying up, rolled up magazines, brshes, shoehorns and rulers for spanking.

Sure there are more, always have my eyes open as i look around the bargain shops : }

smiles

adam

 Don’t do anything you are not prepared to explain to a paramedic.