aaarrrrgggghhh so angry and upset :(

Its a dating site i assume, To google!!

POF = plenty of fish, a dating website.

To the OP - I'm so sorry I don't want to come on and repeat everything everyone's said because you've been given some good advice, but sending you a lot of love and hugs. You'll find a lot of support here, and you will get through this and come out the other side a stronger person. He, on the other hand, will always be an arsehole! xx

ToyingAround wrote:

 Miss Teach & Nurse - Yes it is unfortunately. 

 Im sorry to hear ToyingAround, he clearly was not worth your time or energy sweet xxx

Some people just dont deserve to be with people as amazing as us lot :)

Mis BBW

 i wont post my thoughts because from experience they would all be negative, best of luck sweets and  try to move on , you will find a way

thankyou for all your kind words, i felt ok yesterday in the end, but have woken up today with the horrible sicky feeling.

yes i know most men on POF are after just sex, but after 7 months together when we originally split up, i know he wanted more than that, but hes changed his mind now :(

he texted me a bit yesterday asking if i was ok, saying hes not going to change his mind but does care about me and doesnt want me to be hurt.

so i said yes i think youre right, lets cut all contact and leave it at that, then he changes tact and comes back with, maybe ill pop round one day!  lol i dont think so! i told him its all or nothing, then he tries our sex talk when hes being dom and saying i own you (not in a nasty way, thats just what we say to each other) i just think you are driving me mad.

so i went to bed a bit happier, cos i felt like i had the upper hand telling him no, but then i expected him to text me this morning with a bit more trying to win me over, but no, nothing, and im left feeling all deflated again :( ive checked and he's not been back on POF again

MISSBBW wrote:

i told him its all or nothing

I think that's probably the best thing you could have said, well done.

MISSBBW wrote:

thankyou for all your kind words, i felt ok yesterday in the end, but have woken up today with the horrible sicky feeling.

yes i know most men on POF are after just sex, but after 7 months together when we originally split up, i know he wanted more than that, but hes changed his mind now :(

he texted me a bit yesterday asking if i was ok, saying hes not going to change his mind but does care about me and doesnt want me to be hurt.

so i said yes i think youre right, lets cut all contact and leave it at that, then he changes tact and comes back with, maybe ill pop round one day!  lol i dont think so! i told him its all or nothing, then he tries our sex talk when hes being dom and saying i own you (not in a nasty way, thats just what we say to each other) i just think you are driving me mad.

so i went to bed a bit happier, cos i felt like i had the upper hand telling him no, but then i expected him to text me this morning with a bit more trying to win me over, but no, nothing, and im left feeling all deflated again :( ive checked and he's not been back on POF again

 Good for you babe, just remain strong! I know that the first few mornings will be tough especially when ur used to that wake up txt etc but you've already shown him your worth more! 

xxx

he wants his cake and eat it..................stand by your guns, chances are if he gets back into your good books and visits, it will be the same, sex, disappears and then the dread 'dear john' text.

I'd delete his number and block him on pof

If you really want to try to make it work I think you have to change the basis of the relationship. Win back some ground my not being available, dont answer texts immediately, dont answer at all on an evening. If he says he doesnt want commitment and would like casual relationships, say thats a great idea and you are having a date tonight.  Dont respond to the dom/sub texts that is what you did in a loving relationship not with a casual aquaintance, which he seems to want to be.

As others have said and in my experience also (with a girl) some want what they cant have but arnt interested in what they do have. My first GF messed me around for 2 yrs then turned on the waterworks when I said I had met someone else.

I cant guarantee anything will work nobody can but at least you will get back some self respect. Good luck !

you know what? i love you lot. loads xx

ytes has too much to drink had a bit of a cry, love him loads

have not contactec him all, day, then get a loaf text tonight saying am i out with another guy etc, am i gonna suck him, am i gonna fuck him?

#dont want anyone else but want you not to be an arseholee to me

gunther trying to do what uoo suggest, cos i want to make it work, i love hin like nothijf before. not even ex husband

want hjim to want me like i want him but not gonna be amug

Miss BBW when you have played with him for a while, sit him down and tell him full square in the face that he is behaving like a child, that his behaviour is so transparent and predictable it can be forcast by complete strangers on a forum. Take control of your life and his, dont be sub be a bit dom, personaly i dont play sub dom games but I do accept that in our relationship it is my job to satisfy her not the other way around, I believe most successful relationships are built around that (sorry, that is controversial I know but I believe it to be true<)

 MissBBW, this guy sounds like such an absolute waster. He doesn't deserve your time, and he sure as hell doesn't deserve your tears.

You are gorgeous, and intelligent, and far far too good for him. Give 'im a slap.

cheer_up wrote:

 MissBBW, this guy sounds like such an absolute waster. He doesn't deserve your time, and he sure as hell doesn't deserve your tears.

You are gorgeous, and intelligent, and far far too good for him. Give 'im a slap.

but that doesnt help, does it?

 Got the perfect song - 

its old school cheese but might make u smile 

Eamon - Fuck it (i dont want you back) :) xxx

gunther wrote:

cheer_up wrote:

 MissBBW, this guy sounds like such an absolute waster. He doesn't deserve your time, and he sure as hell doesn't deserve your tears.

You are gorgeous, and intelligent, and far far too good for him. Give 'im a slap.

but that doesnt help, does it?

 The last bit was a joke. Apologies if that didn't come across.

hey cheer up, it is easy to say dump him but if a woman wanted to dump him she doesnt need much advice, finding ways to make it work is much harder

 I know how difficult long-distance relationships are. I worked at mine for three years before I threw in the towel, so I know how hard it is to make it work.

My reply was intended to show support, since I read the thread as being about a bloke saying that he didn't want to be in the relationship any more, and then playing around (getting back with MissBBW and then changing his mind again). That, to me, makes the bloke an arse. Or, if he isn't an arse, he has certainly acted like one in this instance.

I understand that dumping someone doesn't require much outside input, but that wasn't how I read the OP. To my mind, the relationship was already over and then he was messing with her head. It's unfair of him.

cheer up i have been in a long distance relationship since 7.30AM on 25 March 1982, i know how hard it is but lets not give a council of despair to BBW

gunther wrote:

hey cheer up, it is easy to say dump him but if a woman wanted to dump him she doesnt need much advice, finding ways to make it work is much harder

Almost all of the reply's have said he's not worth it.... not just cheer up's one.