Man keeps monkey alive by licking its anus for an hour 
http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2012/05/04/chinese-zoo-keeper-shows-dedication-by-licking-monkeys-bottom-to-save-his-life_n_1476795.html
Maybe lovehoney could send him a free Sqweel in case it happens again 
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=17045