Have you ever.....a place to tell all your bad sex expieriences

((Bump))

Loads I still haven't said (and will prob still keep quiet about! lol!)

Me and my man were having sex in his uncles living room once (uncle was away) and we used to put the porn on while we did it. Well. One night we did this, but we forgot to change the channel again before turning the telly off. His uncle must have got a bit of a fright when he came home later that night, switched the telly on to watch news or whatever and find a free to view fetish porn channel come up!

Another time when we were staying at his uncles, I somehow managed to lose my bra. (Have I told you this one yet? Meh.) Don't ask how I lost my bra, no idea, but I must have been pretty drunk because I didn't realise til I got home that I was bra-less! Months later I'm sitting with my man and his uncle having a cuppa and chatting away and his uncle leans over and says "Oh, there is something for you in that cupboard." I was a bit apprehensive as I had no idea what to expect. I thought he was winding me up (he used to tease me with a big jar of dead spiders) and I had completely forgotton about the bra. I finally open the cupboard at his persuasion to find my purple patterned bra stuffed in there! I'm a little worried about how long he knew he had it, before letting me take it back! 0.0 Fair to say I was a little embaressed to be reunited with that bra again!

One of the worst was sharing a sleeping bag with a girl in a room with another couple. We fucked but there was absolutely no room to move. I couldn't thrust and she couldn't open her legs. An uncomfortable night was had by all.

I was giving my partner a blow job in the middle of the night one day, and my partner thought he would grab my hair and get a little rough and thrust into my mouth, suddenly he slipped, bust my lip and nose, and cut his end. Good thing we had 2 bathrooms, as we spent about 15 minutes hovering over the sink, with bits of tissue stuck places...we woke in the morning, my partner looked like he had a bee sting end, and I looked like I had a trout pout and had 10 rounds with David Hayes.

ToyingAround wrote:

I was giving my partner a blow job in the middle of the night one day, and my partner thought he would grab my hair and get a little rough and thrust into my mouth, suddenly he slipped, bust my lip and nose, and cut his end. Good thing we had 2 bathrooms, as we spent about 15 minutes hovering over the sink, with bits of tissue stuck places...we woke in the morning, my partner looked like he had a bee sting end, and I looked like I had a trout pout and had 10 rounds with David Hayes.

Ouch!

ToyingAround wrote:

I was giving my partner a blow job in the middle of the night one day, and my partner thought he would grab my hair and get a little rough and thrust into my mouth, suddenly he slipped, bust my lip and nose, and cut his end. Good thing we had 2 bathrooms, as we spent about 15 minutes hovering over the sink, with bits of tissue stuck places...we woke in the morning, my partner looked like he had a bee sting end, and I looked like I had a trout pout and had 10 rounds with David Hayes.

Ahhhhhhh!

This made me grab my crotch protectively and my eyes go like this: - ouch!

ToyingAround wrote:

I was giving my partner a blow job in the middle of the night one day, and my partner thought he would grab my hair and get a little rough and thrust into my mouth, suddenly he slipped, bust my lip and nose, and cut his end. Good thing we had 2 bathrooms, as we spent about 15 minutes hovering over the sink, with bits of tissue stuck places...we woke in the morning, my partner looked like he had a bee sting end, and I looked like I had a trout pout and had 10 rounds with David Hayes.

Had to reply too with a BIG OUCHY...............................................

Oh gosh... I tend to repress these memories.

A mild one - This guy started biting me and it was ooh that's nice at first to owwwww you've drawn blood. I didn't like that.

Shortly after I married my (now ex) husband we had a little touring caravan that we kept at a site on Scotland's west coast and we'd go whenever we got the chance too. 

Back then, we had a pretty active sex life but one morning when we were having some fun someone slapped the side of the van a few times and told us to calm down, that he was getting sea sick watching the van rock.

Once when I was much younger, failed to get a miss turned on, and penetration was, well, 'dry'... To the extent that it ripped the little string between your forskin and penis. It bleeds like hell, she was horrified because she thought she had just come on!! Funny in hindsight but not at the time hehe

When I was in my twenties I went back to a caravan with a guy I knew. We were getting hot and heavy and he was just going down on me when the bedroom door opened and a few of his friends burst in. They had obviously brought a lot of people back for a party and one girl called out to the crowd 'Hey Colin's licking some girl's minge in there!' Needless to say that killed the mood!

The worse thing was having to walk out a few minutes later to get a taxi home with everyone staring at me and some of the guys making licky tongue faces at me!!!!

Not too many bad sex experiences, I have been caught in the act in a bathroom during a party - that killed things very quickly, it was the owner of the house that caught us and he wasn't very pleased. The woman and I had only met about two hours before and I don't think I was supposed to be doing that to his friend in his bathroom!

Another time I woman I was seeing was on the bed face down with her bum in the air and I was kneeling behind her, pumping as hard and fast as I could, then just as I orgasmed into her and relaxed I let out a rather loud fart! I don't think I've been so embaresssed since. Later we laughed about it.

chickylicky wrote:

When I was in my twenties I went back to a caravan with a guy I knew. We were getting hot and heavy and he was just going down on me when the bedroom door opened and a few of his friends burst in. They had obviously brought a lot of people back for a party and one girl called out to the crowd 'Hey Colin's licking some girl's minge in there!' Needless to say that killed the mood!

The worse thing was having to walk out a few minutes later to get a taxi home with everyone staring at me and some of the guys making licky tongue faces at me!!!!

That how you got your screen name?

 One of the funniest things that ever happened to me was one time while I was going down on a GF, she was a squirter so I was expecting a flood, she got a bit to enthusiastic and pushed too hard, ended up peeing in my mouth. took a few seconds to realise it wasn't the usual flood.

My cheeks inflated like Tom when Jerry throws dynamite in his mouth, I had to spit, she was still peeing, I covered her, she covered me. The towels we'd put down because she usually squirted were nowhere near man enough for the job.

She was horrified. I tried to laugh it off but she just couldn't even look at me for a few days. It took ages to get her to see the funny side. Apparently my face was a picture with the wide surprised eyes and bulging cheeks before I coughed and sprayed it everywhere

It's not really embarrassing for me, more for the OH.. We were housesitting for friends of ours and the first night we decided to christen their bed, per se.. After he came, he fell asleep. Still in me. I had to climb off him and I left the condom on him for him to clean up when he woke up. We woke up in the morning and the condom had come off him and was halfway down the bed, along with a very obvious stain..

I was seeing this guy when i was about 18 he lived at home , I went round when his mum was out and we got it on in his bedroom, he begged me to get naked and gut feeling was not to !!! ( so should have gone with the gut feeling), I got naked n his bloody mum just walked into his roomwith out knocking and saw me  in a very compromising position.   All she said was ohh i dont spose you want a cup of tea then I was mortified LOL ~Juicy~

Being caught in ex boyfriends parents bed by his dad the local vicar....

My first time had caused me to bleed quite heavy from broken hymen i dunno if thats unusual.

Once during a party at mine me and a guy I was seeing at the time went up to my room to have sex... We were mid session when in walks one of my drunken friends looking for a CD, she must have known what we were doing but carried on what she was doing and then came over and gave me a hugand said what a good party it was haha.

HellsBells72 wrote:

Shortly after I married my (now ex) husband we had a little touring caravan that we kept at a site on Scotland's west coast and we'd go whenever we got the chance too. 

Back then, we had a pretty active sex life but one morning when we were having some fun someone slapped the side of the van a few times and told us to calm down, that he was getting sea sick watching the van rock.

hahaha! i like this one!

my first time having sex was really dire- it was a one night stand thing- we were in a tent and my best friend was asleep next to us while we were at it. not only that but as it was my first time it was reaaally painful and i had to make him stop. and we didn't use a condom- doh doh doh

apart from that nothing horrendous has happened with me and my oh- a couple of time he has caught me while fingering me and made me bleed.

i have cried a few times during sex too!!