• Reporting Threads - Please Read :)

    1447931184
    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi everyone

    Off the back of a few threads, posts and comments I've spotted popping up across the forum, I feel I need to reiterate that we have a report button on the Lovehoney forum and it is there to be used

    Rather than get tangled up in arguments, or being nasty to one another, please please please use the report function. It's what it's there for.

    Using the report button highlights any issues directly to me and Cazz, which enables us to step in and help out or email members directly to remind them how they should conduct themselves while using our forum.

    If you choose not to use it, it's pure luck as to whether we actually see the thread or not, which just leaves things to escalate further. 

    Most of the heated conversations which take place here are down to people not re-reading their post and considering how someone else might read it before submitting. It doesn't take long to proofread your posts and take a moment to think about how other members may feel when they read it. I do it every single time I post here - and even then, I'm sure some of my posts get taken the wrong way simply because we're all human, and see things with our own perspective. 

    It makes me sad and frustrated that people choose to either stop using the forum, or stop posting simply because of a disagreement here. Firstly, we're all adults and it would be impossible for us to all agree on all topics all of the time (imagine how boring it would be if we did?!). Also, being adults, I'm sure we ALL have our own stresses going on in our personal lives which we may not discuss openly here. Posting while harbouring any stress from work, the kids, your cat, the broken dishwasher etc does impact your interaction, whether you're posting or reading. Taking an extra moment to consider what might be going on in other peoples' lives when reading and replying to posts will have a huge impact on everyone's happiness. 

    Secondly, at Lovehoney, we provide you with all the tools necessary to deal with heated situations. Opting to leave rather than report problematic posts just avoids the situation and allows the forum to slip further and further from its purpose. *sadface*

    I understand that you guys aren't moderators and it's not your 'job' to do anything. However (and I hope you'll agree) Lovehoney has always been more of a community than 'just a forum', and as a community it's our duty to look out for one another.

    If you want to really help us out and keep this forum the friendly helpful place it's always been, please use the report function - even if you're not 100% sure whether you should. I'd rather something be brought to our attention that doesn't need it, than something vital be missed. In the same way, please don't assume 'someone else will report it' because if everyone thinks that, nothing would ever be reported. I'd rather have 100 reports for the same thing, than none. 

    How to Use the Report Button

    1) The report button can be found underneath each members profile image on every post

    2) Click the report button and you'll be presented with a box to tell us exactly what you're reporting, and why

    3) Using the report function does not tell us which post your reporting - it simply links us to the whole thread. See below for information to include that helps us act quickly.

    4) Click 'Report This Post'

    Please include the following information in your report:
    - the member you're reporting
    - what you're reporting (eg an entire thread, an certain post, an image)
    - the page number the offending post can be found on
    - why you're reporting it (does it break the rules? are you personally offended by something that's been said?) 
    - any additional information (eg what time it was posted)

    Reported posts are reviewed by me or Cazz within 48 working hours (Mon-Fri) but are usually looked at much much quicker than this.  

    As always, your help, support and friendliness to new and existing members is really appreciated. and you truly are a wonderful bunch! The only reason I'm posting this is to nip any potential fallings-out in the bud and maintain harmony here. (See? Me worrying my post won't be taken properly! :P )

    If you have any questions about the above, or anything else, pop it below and I'll do my best to answer ASAP. 

    Taaaaa!!! 

    1447931322
    Lovethekink [sign in to see picture]
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    Well said Jess 😊

    let's hope this is a means to an end with any issues! X

    1447931439
    Scorpius12 [sign in to see picture]
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    Well said Jess :) xx

    1447931496

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
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    Thanks. I think I'll just quietly move along though. It's been fun.

    1447932659
    bondagegod [sign in to see picture]
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    Think this needed to be said after the post past night. Well done Jess.

    1447934257
    Lovebirds_x [sign in to see picture]
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    Well said, always glad to see proof that we have a lovely mod team :)

    I defintiely think more attention needs to be paid to this part:

    Posting while harbouring any stress from work, the kids, your cat, the broken dishwasher etc does impact your interaction, whether you're posting or reading.

    It's so important to realise when you're being oversensitive while reading or taking out your real life frustration while posting. One might even consider it a life skill for participating in a forum, where there's basically no context. Would save a great deal of stress if people simply asked 'am I taking this the wrong way', either to the person who posted or to themselves, because usually the answer is yes! Gives people the chance to apologize and move on, or indeed be caught out for being nasty people and removed from the forum. Which either way clears the air :p

    1447935798
    Shadow Collector [sign in to see picture]
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    Lovebirds_x wrote:

    Well said, always glad to see proof that we have a lovely mod team :)

    I defintiely think more attention needs to be paid to this part:

    Posting while harbouring any stress from work, the kids, your cat, the broken dishwasher etc does impact your interaction, whether you're posting or reading.

    It's so important to realise when you're being oversensitive while reading or taking out your real life frustration while posting. One might even consider it a life skill for participating in a forum, where there's basically no context. Would save a great deal of stress if people simply asked 'am I taking this the wrong way', either to the person who posted or to themselves, because usually the answer is yes! Gives people the chance to apologize and move on, or indeed be caught out for being nasty people and removed from the forum. Which either way clears the air :p

    Perfectly put :)

    1447937154
    Clockwork_Oasis [sign in to see picture]
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    You guys are doing such an amazing job, Jess and Cazz. I wish our team had been as good as yours when I moderated a huge forum! Impressed =)

    1447942434
    Ladybette [sign in to see picture]
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    +1 to above comments. Boiled down to one sentence? Everyone play nice. :-)

    1447944511
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    I just wanted to add if I may.

    Forums are about differing opinions hence we have a discussion . If people had all the same opinions then there would not be much point in having a forum.

    Even if you don't agree with the opinion of a poster then its not nice to try and shoot it down. State your own view and leave it at that.

    I think the problems have been in the past and I have been on the receiving end of these on one occasion is were an OP will have one view. A second poster will disagree with this view and may say something that is on the borderline of being nasty. Then of course you get the third poster saying "+1" without adding anything and then the thrid and fourth and so on. The effect is you get a cascade ganging up on the original poster . I think we need to all be mindful of this type of cascade and keep being nice and friendly even if we don't agree with the original opinion.

    1447945007
    slinky binky [sign in to see picture]
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    Well said Jess xx
    hopefully this is a means to an end and everyone can play nice now because it's nice to be nice xx

    1447946715
    MysticalMayhem [sign in to see picture]
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    No one is the same, we are all different, we all like different things. We can't all agree on the same thing. So there will be confusion and conflict from time to time. I've loved the community here and the diversity of people. :)

    1447947673
    LeilaK [sign in to see picture]
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    Totally agree Jess :)

    I think we have a lovely bunch of people here at Lovehoney. There will be disagreements from time to time, it's only normal. If we can all have respect for one another and be nice, it will continue to be a cool place to hang out x

    1447958882
    JM88 [sign in to see picture]
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    Jess, a quick question. You said that you would rather have 100 people report the same post than none because everyone assumes someone else did it, does that still apply if someone posts that they have reported it?

    i have seen in the past someone, clearly trolling, and then 5 or 6 people comment with "reported". I always thought that would take up your time more than if the first person reported it and then everyone else ignored it because they knew it was already being dealt with.

    1447968137
    Dali256 [sign in to see picture]
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    JM88 wrote:

    Jess, a quick question. You said that you would rather have 100 people report the same post than none because everyone assumes someone else did it, does that still apply if someone posts that they have reported it?

    i have seen in the past someone, clearly trolling, and then 5 or 6 people comment with "reported". I always thought that would take up your time more than if the first person reported it and then everyone else ignored it because they knew it was already being dealt with.

    I always assumed the more reports something gets would help mods know which thread to deal with first. Something with 100 reports would go to the top of the to do list over others with less.

    Thats just my guess though, no insider knowledge.

    1447983971
    mummymermaid [sign in to see picture]
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    I have loved it here since my very first post and I find I have every now and again found myself feeling over sensitive..luckily I do recognize it and I either take a break for a few days and don't come on..or I read the forums but I don't post. It can be hard though there was a misunderstanding on customer care and I got upset and silly but I recognized it and stopped..it can be hard but if the forums are to stay as lovely as they are..it's important xxx

    1447999278
    Lovehoney - Paige [sign in to see picture]
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    I would just like to add- if you do get in touch with Customer Care in regards to a post / thread that needs to be reported/removed standard procedure is for us to also let Jess and Cazz know too.

    1448010247
    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 30 Nov 2012

    JM88 wrote:

    Jess, a quick question. You said that you would rather have 100 people report the same post than none because everyone assumes someone else did it, does that still apply if someone posts that they have reported it?

    i have seen in the past someone, clearly trolling, and then 5 or 6 people comment with "reported". I always thought that would take up your time more than if the first person reported it and then everyone else ignored it because they knew it was already being dealt with.

    Hey JM88

    Good question. I agree that if another member has said they've already reported the post then there's no need for it to be reported again. Having said that, if you would like to draw something specific to our attention, then by all means report it too.

    For example, you may want to report a post that doesn't necessarily 'break the rules', but could be offensive. In that instance I always welcome your thoughts and opinions on the post. Most things are pretty clear to make a decision on straight away, but on occasion a post can be really on the fence. In those instances, your opinions and feelings really help to tip our decision one way or another. 

    In the same way, although what Dali256 said isn't quite right (the reported posts all get jumbled into one big list regardless of how many times it's been reported) if we see that 20+ people have all reported one post/member, it's pretty clear to us that we need to take action ASAP. It's one thing when one person reports a post as it could be a simple difference of opinion between two people, but when a post has really narked of a whole group of you, then it's a different story and it's clear action should be taken quickly. 

    Does that help or are my pre-coffee ramblings just adding to the confusion? lol 

    1448010538
    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
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    Lovehoney - Paige wrote:

    I would just like to add- if you do get in touch with Customer Care in regards to a post / thread that needs to be reported/removed standard procedure is for us to also let Jess and Cazz know too.

    Indeed! As Paige says, if you would prefer to talk with Customer Care about a post then please do, but as I'm sure you can understand we do our best to reduce calls etc coming into Customer Care for things like this. By reducing the little interactions with our Customer Care team, it gives them more time to help people with order queries, product information and all that other good stuff. 

    Also, just so you know what happens behind the scenes...

    When you report an issue to Customer Care, they use the exact same report function that you guys and gals do to highlight the issue to us, so in effect calling Customer Care just adds an extra step to what you can already do yourselves. It would be much easier for you to just report it yourself as it saves you time calling / live chatting / emailing and means that your report is in your words, rather than your words relayed through Customer Care.

    ^_^  

    1448014202
    MysticalMayhem [sign in to see picture]
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    I have a question;

    Say there's a disagreement.

    X makes a thread about something or other.
    Y doesn't agree.
    X does agree.
    A few others are in two minds.
    The conversation gets heated.
    You guys step in and remove thread.

    Do you email X Y and Z explaining why you've removed the thread? Or do you just email X? Or not email at all? I've always wondered this.

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