• Oh. My. God. We've never really entertained the idea of having sex with a flower, but if we did, this would be enough to put us off instantly.

    The Amorphophallus titanum has a 60-plus-inch phallus, stinks like a corpse and, after three pungent days of sexual activity, goes limp.

    Remind you of anyone you know?

    It's new! We're excited! And we hope you are too! Lovehoney has launched Cock Locker to bring you the best anal toys, cock toys, lubes, aromas and a whole lot more!

    Cock Locker sells everything a gay guy needs to make his sex life go with a bang. From room odourisers to cock straps to butt plugs, it's a non-stop orgy of excitement.

    See you there!

    Click here: Cock Locker

    Bopper frenzy! If you've got a friend who's getting hitched, Lovehoney's new site Hen Night HQ has everything you need to make their last night freedom go with a bang!

    The site has a massive guide to planning the perfect hen night, from a giggling evening in with the girls to a full-on man-eating tour round town. There's a big directory of hen night companies, including limo hire, holiday organisers for hen nights abroad and (of course!) hunky male strippers.

    And it has a massive range of hen night fancy dress and novelties, including boppers, boas, devil's horns, cowboy hats, angel wings, halos, dare cards, silly willies and much more besides. And the best news is that it has unique multi-buy pricing so the more you buy, the cheaper everything gets!

    Click here: Hen Night HQ

    As recommended by The Independent on Sunday, the Vido is a really powerful multi-speed vibrator. It has a special mechanism that transfers vibrations equally along the entire length of the toy, which means the base vibrates as much as the tip. It's rechargable so you get extra power and now it's available for £39.99, saving you £30! Yabba-dabba-do!

    Yes - it's been almost a year since the last blog! Put it down to laziness and nothing else. What has happened since the mad dash to Russia with Love Aids?

    Well, we've launched a whole new range of sites (more of those later!), added hundreds of great new sex toys to Lovehoney, massively increased our range of lingerie, made our Web site even easier to use and made sure our prices are the lowest you'll find online.

    And that's just for starters! Happy shopping!

    But not with our knockers out, thankfully!

    We are 'saucy' - official!

    Latvia, and more specifically, the town of Jurmala was chosen as the final destination... The Extreme Trifle guys knew a guy called Maris -- and he just happens to be the Deputy Mayor of Jurmala! Which meant he was able to get the police to cordon off the street so we could have a massive street party. CEL-E-BRA-ATE!

    You can just about see us behind Thunderbird 4. Yay!

    Repairs required on FAB1! We reported a noise which had been going on for about half a day. Of course, we were ignored to start with, but eventually they realised something was seriously amiss... A quick inspection revealed "a broken valve spring" - I still have no idea what one of those is, what it does or why it's important.

    The guys (heroes to the last) performed emergency surgery yet again and effected a glorious bodge by removing the spring and bending the valve over so the car is now running again "on 3 cylinders". I didn't even know we had one...

    ...so Neville (the sender of several well-wishing messages) has sent us a translation of his last one... Thanks Neville!


    ?????????? ?????.


    Best wishes

    ???? ?????????? ?????? ?????? ????.


    It is necessary to win the struggle (or fight) against cancer

    ????? ??? ??? ??? ??????? ???????.


    I think that both you and the team are brave

    ????? ??? ????????????? ????????


    I wish you a safe arrival (in Russia).

    Keep up the good work!


    Neville

    We have no idea what it means, so we hope it's not rude!


    ?????????? ?????.

    ???? ?????????? ?????? ?????? ????.


    ????? ??? ??? ??? ??????? ???????.


    ????? ??? ????????????? ????????


    Regards,


    Neville

    [When you get this translated I hope my Russian is OK and makes sense!

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