Going back a couple of hundred years design-wise, Dr Joel Kaplan's Female Enhancement Kit isn't strictly speaking a toy but a clitoral aid designed to medical specifications - but as any bondage enthusiast dismayed by furry handcuffs knows, authenticity is everything in role play, and this would fit perfectly with a labcoat, a pair of surgical gloves and a concerned bedside manner.
If you haven't played doctors and nurses since the playground, now's your chance to hone your medical skills.
While we don't (yet) stock anything quite as futuristic as the Virtual Hole, a bold bid in the teledildonics stakes from Japan, we've been mighty impressed with a couple of our new products.
Doc Johnson's Hub is a gorgeously designed space-age sex toy comprising two vibrators - one realistic, one beaded - with a stunning 8 functions and 8 speeds for each, from the readily approachable Vibrate or Pulsate functions to the wilder reaches of Escavibe and Freefall.
As the space race starts (slowly) picking up again, we think every astronaut should have their pick of the current crop of toys to combat zero-G ennui, and the Hub would fit well with NASA's ergonomically designed capsules.
Tracey Cox is probably the world's sexiest sexpert. Born in England but having moved to Australia where she became a renowned sex writer, Tracey Cox knows her stuff when it comes to all things sexual. So how better than Tracey to give you 10 good reasons why you should masturbate on a regular basis?
The following excerpt is taken from Tracey Cox's Hot Sex: How To Do It (published by Corgi).
10 Good Reasons To Masturbate:
1. It feels fantastic
2. It teaches us about our own body: what turns us on, what doesn't. Masturbation helps you identify what your basic sexual needs are and how best to satisfy them. Pass this on to your partner and you have a solid basis for a sizzling sex life.
3. It releases tension and helps us sleep – a secret sleeping pill without any side effects!
4. It teaches us to separate love from sex. We're more able to distinguish sex affairs from love affairs because we realise having an orgasm doesn't mean we're in love.
5. If you're single, it stops you climbing the walls or sleeping with the first guy or girl you meet.
6. It's totally safe
7. It's a great beauty treatment. Orgasm improves circulation, combats the effects of stress and makes skin glow!
8. You can concentrate purely on your own pleasure without worrying about someone else!
9. The more you masturbate, the more orgasms you'll be capable of having both with and without your partner. The more you do it, the easier they are to reach!
10. Being able to give yourself an orgasm is true sexual independence.
So I was sitting in the opera box at this chic fetish club last night, drinking Black Tooth Grins and trying not to faint in my ultra-clingy PVC baby doll corset dress. He was sitting in the box next to ours and making it blatantly obvious that he was interested in what was underneath my slinky, shiny PVC.
Sex isn't complicated, especially when you have a Heavy Metal 5-inch dildo between your legs. So if the best offer you have this week is a fumbled fuck with the geek from IT, tell him 'no thanks' and pummel your pussy with this slice of orgasmic metal-ness instead.
Hold almost unbearably tight! Precscription drug Viagra could have some more competition by the end of the year - from a Durex condom. The rubber-johnny maker is aiming to launch a revolutionary condom, codename CSD500, in late 2007. Its secret: an "erectogenic compound" called Zanifil that has a similar effect to Viagra but is applied directly to the skin.
The drug is currently waiting for approval by the US Federal Drug Administration and could be be the first Viagra-like chemical to be sold over the counter. If you can't wait til the end of the year, try one our male sex drive boosters.
We spoke to Design A Sex Toy winner Trevor Murphy to find out what inspired his design - and how he felt about winning £1,000 and the chance to have his sex toy made!
What inspired the design?
"I had designed two toys for the competition already, based on existing toys already on the market. I really wanted it to be original so I had a look at the toys out there for ladies...
Cue drum roll! The winner of the The Lovehoney Design A Sex Toy Competition is:
Revolverotica designed by Trevor Murphy from Ireland
Congratulations! Trevor wins £1,000 and the chance to have his sex toy made.
Trevor's design impressed the judges because it was absolutely unique - there isn't another sex toy like it.
"I think it's a brilliant idea," said judge and sex author Tracey Cox. "Nearly every women I know of will want one these!"
From Trevor's detailed drawings and description, it was also possible for Dominic Hawes of UK sex toy manufacturer Mantric Marketing to imagine how the product could be made at a cost low enough for the finished item to have a reasonable selling price.
We have to keep the design and precise function of the Revolverotica secret because we are investigating the feasibility of making the product. But we'll keep the Design A Sex Toy Blog updated with product developments.
If Trevor's design goes into production, he could even make a royalty on every unit sold, so we want to protect his idea from copy-cat competitors.
Four other entries were highly commended by the judges:
Passionate Flex - a double-ended vibrator
G-Up - a new-style G-spot vibrator
The Lazy Wank - an innovative male masturbator
Cocktus - a novel clitoral vibrator
An old friend of mine came round last night with a bottle of wine, some body paints and a naughty selection of painting tools. At first I laughed out loud at his suggestions of painting each other using chocolate body paint and tickling feathers, paint brushes and different fruits, but when he described in immense detail exactly where he would concentrate his artistic efforts, I soon took him seriously.
God Bless the Daily Mail. Ann Summers boss Jacqueline Gold is invited to meet the Queen and rather than celebrate this wonderful award, the Mail runs a lengthy hatchet job entitled The Queen of Sleaze. Terrible.
With rampant assertions that the Ann Summers empire was built off the back of the Gold brothers' porn empire, the Mail clearly knows what turns its readers on - why else would it repeatedly mention magazine titles like Hardcore Housewives and coverlines like "'barely legal young sweet p***y"? (The Mail's asterisks, not mine.) While being exceptionally cruel to Jacqueline Gold, it's a work of journalistic art - until they get some basic facts wrong.
Yes, even the Mail has fallen into the trap of perpetuating the Rampant Rabbit Myth, claiming that Ann Summers's registered trademark vibrator was featured in the Sex And The City TV show. When, as any fool knows, it wasn't.
"[Gold Group's] last accounts show that the [Ann Summers] sex shops accounted for 97 per cent of its £3 million profit in 2005 and 84 per cent of its £145 million turnover," says the Mail. "All this was achieved by persuading women to gather together to buy the Rampant Rabbit Thruster (as seen on Sex In The City)..."