So I have a sex blog. I try out a lot of sex toys, I read a lot of news on sex, people talk to me about sex. I wouldn't call it a cushy job, but it certainly has its perks, right? But there is a downside, my friends. A very serious downside. Just this evening - after having yet another friend tell me that what I do is certainly not work - I was sat here with vibrating nipple clamps dangling from my... well... nipples, naturally, for the betterment of my sex bloggy knowledge. It is all for you, and darn it, I don't complain.
There's nothing more frustrating than a vibrator that doesn't quite get you there, and when it comes to vibrators, for most people it's a case of 'the more power the better'. But working out how powerful a sex toy is, without trying it for yourself, is near-enough impossible. Don't worry! Lovehoney has valiantly tested the lot to find the top 10 toys with the strongest vibrations and most intense sensations.
Mains powered sex toys top our chart, because of the large amount of energy they receive from your power supply - there's just no beating them if power is top of your vibrator shopping list. Rechargeable toys come a close second, with their excellent battery life and strong motors, followed up by traditional battery-powered sex toys that still pack an incredible punch.
More good news from the Venus Berlin Sex Show for the world's lazy onanists, this time from Japan. And no, we don't mean the pretty Japanese girl in the bunny outfit, rather the SOM Series of electrical masturbators that she's representing.
Much more clinical in appearance than many fucking machines - a polite way of saying they don't look like they've been made in a shed - the SOM Series is a range of masturbators, two for men and one for women.
While I was working on the last series on introducing sex toys to your partner, costumes kept coming up into the discussion around these parts. The two are quite related, really - one may rely more on fantasy than on batteries, but both require an open mind, a sexy attitude, and an interest in pleasing your partner (and yourself, of course - we're none of us Mother Theresa here).
So what do you know about costumes? Do you know the different kinds that are out there? How about how to use them without laughing out loud and spoiling all the fun? Can you imagine the right scenarios to go with the costumes?
And from all of these questions come the next series. Over the next three Fridays (they'll be posted early in the morning, regardless of when you finally get to them, sleepy-head), I'll be talking about the various ins and outs (literally and figuratively, naturally) of costumes and how to best incorporate them into your bedroom (or out room) play. I'll try to touch on the major topics, but as always, if there is anything you are wondering that I don't bring up, do feel free to give a shout. We're all of us friendly here...
Here's a question for you: how lazy does a man have to be not to wank himself off? Pretty lazy and pretty wealthy, if the prices of the male masturbation machines on display at Venus are anything to go by.
Once upon a time, a bloke would lie on his left arm for half an hour before bashing the bishop and that was enough to make it feel like someone else was doing it. Now, though, some of the finest (or perviest) minds in engineering are trying to perfect the perfect wank for the laziest men alive.
A behind-the-scenes glimpse into the trade hall at the Venus Sex Show in Berlin. Penis bean bags, porn DVD vending machines, and a guy with a hands-free masturbator await. Oh, and not to mention the crazy fucking machine at the end...