• The Noobs' Guide to Valentine's Nookie: 4 Winning Ways to Spice it Up

    With Valentine's Day fast approaching (the kinky sister of Christmas) and couples buying gifts for each other left, right and centre, what better time of year to try something new in the bedroom?

    However, no matter what time of year, broaching the subject of adding something new to bedroom play can be somewhat tricky. Some partner's might feel inadequate for your needs, judged by their interests or not really understand the benefits of sex toys yet.

    A great way to open the discussion is to ask your lover if you can do anything to make sex better for them, or talk to them about activities you find arousing during masturbation to help them to open up.

    We've broken down the four stages of exploring sex toys within your relationhip to make it easy for you. Just work out which level you're at now, and follow our guidelines for what and how to try something new.

    Most importantly, always respect your partner's wishes and never be offended if there's something they really don't want to try.



    Level 1: Sensual Massage

    A great way of gently introducing a new object to intimate play, honing your massage technique not only leads to a more satisfying massage, better foreplay and sensational sex, it's also a great way to introduce accessories like oil and massagers to bedroom fun.

    Check out our dos and don'ts below to find out how you can give better massage whilst introducing your partner to new bedroom toys in a non-intimidating way.

    Do:

    • Research: Pick up a book or read an article on massage before you start
    • Use lubricant: Always use a massage oil or candle to ensure maximum pleasure
    • Talk: Make sure your partner doesn't have any 'no go zones' before you start
    • Use a tool: A massager or hot rocks are a great way to apply pleasant, relaxing pressure that's doesn't jab

    Don't: 

    • Go in blind: Nudging and prodding without a clue can hurt, so don't do it!
    • Poke: Sharp body parts like finger nails and finger tips don't feel nice so try to avoid digging your fingers in
    • Rush: A hurried massage feels rubbish and will put your lover off trying other new things
    • Assume: A massage with oil doesn't suddenly open the door for all sex toys (or even sex). Take one step at a time

    You will need:

    1. Lovehoney Lovers Sensual Body Massager

      Lovehoney Lovers Sensual Body Massager (£4.99)

      Enables a deep, widespread massage that's as enjoyable to receive as it is to give.

    2. Lovehoney Lovers Vanilla Lickable Massage Oil 113ml

      Lovehoney Lovers Vanilla Lickable Massage Oil 113ml (£12.99)

      Ensures easy gliding for pinch free, soothing massages (and it tastes good too!)

    3. Erotic Massage by Anne Hooper

      Erotic Massage by Anne Hooper (£10.99)

      Knowledge is power! Buff up on your massage technique for maximum pleasure.


    Level 2: Using Sex Toys for Foreplay

    If you've already mastered sensual massage and you and your lover are pretty au fait with massage oils and the like, you're probably ready to move onto something a little more erotic.

    Adding a toy to foreplay is a great way to discover new kinky ideas, as well as adding extra stimulation to tip you over the edge before sex. It's important to keep foreplay sex toys simple to avoid over complication or distraction from each other's number 1 toy - your bodies!

    Do:

    • Research: Check out our Buyer's Guides for our top toys for beginners
    • Get something to share: Choosing a toy you're happy to use on each other/yourself makes exploration less intimidating and more exciting
    • Communicate: Ask your partner if they have a favourite spot they like to be touched. Use that for inspiration
    • Read the instructions: All products come with top tips for maximum enjoyment. Read them ahead of time to make sure you don't have to fumble through a booklet mid-play. And remember to get batteries!

    Don't:

    • Overdo it: Choose an appropriate product and build up to the kinkier ones when you're ready
    • Get obsessed: We know it's exciting playing with a new toy, but keep foreplay varied for maximum enjoyment
    • Forget lube: Whether lube is your foreplay product, or you've opted for something else, lube can be the difference between "ooOOhh" and "ooOOww"
    • Give up: If the first toy you try isn't quite right, that's ok! Just try something different next time

    You will need:

    1. Lovehoney Lovers Erotic Foreplay Dice

      Lovehoney Lovers Erotic Foreplay Dice (£4.99)

      A fun way to get new ideas for thrilling foreplay. Blame the dice and roll again if you don't like the result!

    2. Lovehoney Enjoy Water-Based Lubricant 100ml

      Lovehoney Enjoy Water-Based Lubricant 100ml (£4.99)

      Lube is the best. No matter what you're doing, lube enhances sensation, duration and pleasure.

    3. Lovehoney Dream Bullet 10 Function Bullet Vibrator

      Lovehoney Dream Bullet 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (£9.99)

      A simple sex toy that feels amazing when traced over his or her sweet spots.


    Level 3: Tie and Tease

    Asking your partner if you can tie them up and spank them can seem like a tricky subject to broach, but with bondage becoming more and more popular (and way less taboo), it really is much easier to explore this kink than you may think. Plus, if you and your partner have already explored massage and lube, you could be ready to take this next step...

    Restraint play is a fantastic way to immediately increase arousal and sensation during intimacy and nowadays it doesn't have to be intimidating. We stock a wide range of beginner's restraints and accessories to make your transition from vanilla to kinky easy and safe.

    Do:

    • Start small: Products like feather ticklers and blindfolds are a softer introduction than restraints, which can seem scary to the inexperienced
    • Listen: Be alert to your partner at all times, and be aware of when changes in intensity may be appreciated
    • Discuss boundaries: Set up a safety word and set clear boundaries before play begins
    • Practice: Get familiar with your bondage toys before the big night to ensure confidence during use

    Don't:

    • Leave the room: Never leave a bound partner unattended. Ever
    • Guess: Never attempt advanced bondage techniques without proper training and equipment
    • Be drunk: Never ever explore BDSM whilst under the influence of drugs or aclohol
    • Follow Fifty Shades of Grey: Listen to your partner, not fictional characters

    You will need:

    1. Lovehoney Lovers Feather Tickler

      Lovehoney Lovers Feather Tickler (£4.99)

      100% non-intimidating and a great way to heighten sensitivity head-to-toe for sexy tingles.

    2. Lovehoney Lovers Satin Blindfold

      Lovehoney Lovers Satin Blindfold (£4.99)

      Cover your lovers eyes and they'll immediately become ultra-sensitive all over. (Also great for sleeping!)

    3. Lovehoney Lovers Silky Bondage Restraints

      Lovehoney Lovers Silky Bondage Restraints (£9.99)

      Super-silky restraints for simple tie-and-tease fun, made from lingerie materials for a soft introduction.


    Level 4: Using Sex Toys for Sex

    If you and your lover struggle to climax together during sex, introducing a sex toy could help. Whether it's a toy that stimulates both of you, one of you, or works to slow things down, we have a plethora of playthings to get you started.

    Nowadays, there are all sorts of couples toys designed to amp up sex and foreplay, but some are better suited to beginners than others. Pick up a toy that's easy to set up and won't hurt your bank balance with our top picks below.

    Do:

    • Talk about it: Which one of you could benefit from extra stimulation? And where?
    • Research: Make sure your lubricant is compatible with any toys you want to use
    • Be safe: Only use toys with a flared base for anal, and sugar-free lube for her
    • Listen to your body: If either of you experience unexpected pain or discomfort, stop straight away

    Don't:

    • Overdo it: Bigger is NOT always better and having 'eyes bigger than your (or your partner's) you-know-what could result in complications!
    • Be selfish: Buying something for THEM to satisfy YOUR fantasy never goes down well without discussion
    • Forget foreplay: Using sex toys during sex won't bypass the need for a warm up so always build up to toy use

    You will need:

    1. Durex Performa Intense Mutual Climax Condoms (14 Pack)

      Durex Performa Intense Mutual Climax Condoms (14 Pack) (£14.99)

      Condoms that delay his ejaculation and enhance her pleasure, while ensuring safe sex. Winning!

    2. Lovehoney Bionic Bullet 5 Function Vibrating Cock Ring

      Lovehoney Bionic Bullet 5 Function Vibrating Cock Ring (£16.99)

      Worn around his penis to delay ejaculation, harden his erection and stimulate her clitoris during sex.

    3. Lovehoney Classic Silicone Beginner's Butt Plug

      Lovehoney Classic Silicone Beginner's Butt Plug (£9.99)

      For him: He'll enjoy P-spot massages. For her: She'll feel tighter and enjoy more direct G-spot stim.


    Need more help?

    You can Contact Customer Care, who will be able to help you find the perfect bondage gear. You can send an email any time, and telephone or live chat to an experienced advisor 24 hours a day, and 7 days a week.


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