• Lovehoney's Favourite Sexy Typos

    Hundreds of thousands of words get written at Lovehoney every year. As a writer and editor, it’s my job to make sure they're right. Getting it right is important. After all, if we can’t spell you’re not really going to want to give us your credit card details, are you?

    Writing about sex can get us a bit over-excited, so a combination of fat fingers and a fast pace often leads to mistakes that are - thankfully - mostly picked up before they go live. Here are some of our favourite (and common) errors.

    Please, add your own nominations below...

    Butt Pug

    What I meant: Butt plug.

    What I now think of:

    Butt Pug?


    What I meant: Orgasms.

    What I now think of: Shrek climaxing.

    Anal Beards

    What I meant: Anal beads.

    What I now think of:

    Thankfully. This one could have given me a much worse mental image.

    Sex Tory

    What I meant: Sex toy.

    What I now think of:

    (For those of you who don't know, this is Boris Johnson - Mayor London, notable Conservative 'Tory' politician.)


    What I meant: supersex, the name of a range of Tracey Cox toys on Lovehoney.

    What I now think of: A sexy version of Come Dine With Me. Complete with sarcastic voiceover man.

    Large Dido

    What I meant: Large dildo.

    What I now think of: 

    Alan Lube

    What I meant: Anal lube.

    What I now think of: Who is Alan? Why does he need so much lube?

    Cork Ring

    What I meant: Cock ring.

    What I now think of:

    Even the BBC gets this one wrong sometimes. Exhibit A: BBC News website coverage of royal memorabilia (we've underlined it, it's at bottom right...). I wonder if they would have featured it if they knew it was a cock ring?

    Cork Ring on the BBC

    Stain Knickers

    What I meant: Satin knickers.

    This one happens more times than we care to admit. If you get this one wrong in the product name, it somewhat changes the appeal of a pair of these babies:

    There are many, many more but none half as fun as these. Please, add your own nominations below!

    Oh, and if you spot a typo on Lovehoney then let us know on Found a typo thread in the forum.

    1. How do I choose my first sex toy?
    2. Which is the best sex toy?

    Comments (15)

    • Dumb Domme: October 04, 2012 16:58
      I blogged about a great typo in a romance novel here: http://dumbdomme.com/2011/09/unfortunate-typo-in-romance-novel.html

      “He stiffened for a moment but then she felt his muscles loosen as he *shitted* on the ground.”

      The word was supposed to be “shifted.”


    • Lovehoney - Alice: October 04, 2012 17:03
      @Dumb Domme: Oh, that's absolutely fantastic! We find a lot of typos in erotica, but that is just BEYOND hilarious. How would you be able to carry on after that?!
    • Little Miss: October 04, 2012 20:27
      Butt pug is so cutely wrong, but you just can't beat Boris's dancing!
    • Tilly Hunter: October 05, 2012 09:24
      I work for a newspaper, so I'm always on the lookout for pubic instead of public. But it's only in reading erotica that I've found it the other way round.

      I've also seen 'virginal dryness' in an advice column I was editing.

    • Lovehoney - Alice: October 05, 2012 10:32
      @Little Miss - the butt pug is now my screensaver >.<

      @Tilly - always on the lookout fo pubic, amazing!

      It seems to work the other way as well - I just tried to order a "multispeed baguette" for lunch.

    • Linda: October 05, 2012 13:51
      What did you buy?
      A couple of thongs... instead of things... for the holidays.
    • Avrielle_Aniko: October 12, 2012 12:06
      Alice, thankyou for cheering up my morning. Belated reading (sorry!) but fantastic!

      DumbDomme - That has got me in hysterics!!

      Some of the funniest are predictive text errors! (DYAC)

      "The disc keeps being a pain in the ass. It keeps erecting and I try to put it in but it's not going in right. IDK why it's so hard. Do I have to put it in number 1 or 2???
      ".... *Eject"
      "I know! LMAO!"

      "Can you get me pregnant before you come over today?"
      "What? Now that IS a task!"
      "I meant can you get me pringles from the store before you come over today?"

    • Catherine: November 11, 2012 23:53
      The butt pug one is funny and that picture is adorable.

      I have to say one of the funniest bloopers I have seen was from the TV show Friends in the first season where Rachel tries to write her own erotic book which had a lot of typos:

      Rachel: Okay. Now this is just the first chapter, and I want your absolute honest opinion. Oh, oh, and on page two, he's not 'reaching for her heaving beasts'.

      Monica: What's a 'niffle'?

      Joey: You usually find them on the 'heaving beasts'.

      Rachel: Alright, alright, so I'm not a great typist...

      Ross: Wait, did you get to the part about his 'huge throbbing pens'? Tell ya, you don't wanna be around when he starts writing with those!

      Rachel: Alright, that's it! Give it back! That's it!

      All: Nooo!

    • Lovehoney - Alice: November 21, 2012 12:53
      Magic wad. #notsosexytypo
    • Lovehoney - Alice: December 12, 2012 08:47
      Another not-so-sex-typo... the G-spit
    • Rosie: April 11, 2013 19:11
      Best one I've ever seen was in a bit of online erotica - it was mostly not too bad until I got to the bit where she stared lustfully at the growing bilge in his pants...
      I kinda assume they meant bulge, but it was not a pretty image! Thankfully, too busy laughing to be grossed out.
    • john adams: May 17, 2014 01:00
      cool page just found it looks great
      after placing an order for lubes of fun Ha ha CAN'T WAIT
    • john adams: May 17, 2014 01:02
      the pooch picture is cool
      I LOVE IT
    • Lovehoney - Alice: August 20, 2015 14:54
      Manuel stimulation.


    • Natalie: September 03, 2015 21:34
      I just read about someone wanting to put the sprak back in the bedroom. The mind boggles.
    Add a comment
    1. Yes, please! Email me when there are more comments after mine
    2. We need to ask you a question to prove you're a human because evil spam computers keep abusing our form!