• How do I have sex with my teddy bear?

    Hella
    by Hella on 13 September 2011 3 comments  |  Add a comment

    Hella Sex Doll

    Each week, hundreds of people find Lovehoney after searching the internet for solutions to their sex problems.

    Our alternative agony aunt Hella answers the questions you were too shy to ask anyone (except Google).

    Today:

    How do I have sex with my teddy bear?

    You don’t say if you’re leaning toward furry fetish, you think soft toys offer the best sex simulation platform or you’re just looking for a cuddly companion to get frisky with. Either way around, I can help you to have sex with your teddy bear.

    If it’s all about cuddly textures and you’re a straight man or a lesbian, you may want to think about buying a Teddy Babe or a Teddy Babe Deluxe. These sex dolls are made from soft plush with a squishy fibre filling around their flexible wire frames. They look like woman, they feel like a cuddly toy. With massive boobs and a penetrable pussy, Teddy Babes are an instant fix for furry lovers.

    If you have a specific teddy bear in mind that you want to get freaky with, then we’re going to get a bit Red Peter with some scissors, a needle and thread and your favourite dildo, vibrator or male masturbator.


    Spread teddy's legs and you should see a seam that runs all the way down his (or her) front from the front of the neck to the back. To effectively have sex with your teddy bear, you’re going to have to unpick this seam to allow for the insertion of your favourite toy before sewing it into place.

    To turn your teddy bear into a male masturbator

    How to have sex with your teddy bearUnpick the seam to create a hole in his front that you can slot your masturbator into. If your masturbator has two entries then you’ll need to make a second hole in the back that’s level with the first to allow the male masturbator entry points to rest comfortably.

    Once you’ve made these holes, you can slot your masturbation sleeve in effortlessly. You’ll then want to sew the seam up as much as possible, keeping the male masturbator firmly lodged inside Teddy. It’s possible that you’ll need to remove some excess stuffing, but think of this as Teddy’s imperfect genitals being removed so that a skilled surgeon (you) can replace them with something Teddy can have much more fun with.

    To turn your teddy bear into a female masturbator

    You’ll need to unpick the same seam as described in the male masturbator instructions in order insert your favourite toy. It’s easiest to use a flared-base dildo with balls as the base can be sewn into the bear with the balls and penis protruding. If you want to use a toy that doesn’t have a flared base then you’ll need to find a way of lodging the vibrator or dildo in place so it doesn’t come loose. Placing bulkier cock rings tightly around the shaft before sewing Teddy up will prevent any slippage.

    Fans of flared toys can also turn teddy into an interchangeable sex doll by using an O-ring. You can either buy a metal O-ring and stitch this into Teddy’s crotch or simply sew an opening with the desired diameter. Beware that you will leave Teddy’s insides exposed using this method and that could get ugly.

    Comments (3)

    • Nymeria: September 15, 2011 13:11
      This was quite an insightful look into a fetish. I would have liked to see the end product of the teddy bear with a boner though. lol
    • Tamsin: February 23, 2013 21:58
      my 15 year old daughter wants to know how to get rid of her tits without getting them cut off any ideas
    • Helen: February 28, 2013 16:36
      Why does your daughter want to get rid of her tits?
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