More than 1,000 ejaculations later, the results of Britain's first ever hands-on male masturbation survey are in! We wanted to find out the average number of strokes it takes a guy to ejaculate when he masturbates. The Shootout Survey was a rigorous scientific study that involved more than 1,000 participants.
To help with the research, we sent every subject a sachet of Stroke 29, the masturbation cream that changes consistency on the 29th stroke. Would our subjects keep going past the fabled 29th stroke, or would they pop their peanuts before reaching double digits?
Respondents were asked to bash the bishop and then return to the Shootout Survey Web site to complete an exhaustive questionnaire which asked a series of probing questions about the length and style of the manual manipulation.
The Shootout Survey Results!
The lubes have been used, the knuckles shuffled and the surveys completed. The results are in!
| Total surveys completed: | 1,007 |
| Surveys from gay men: | 124 |
| Surveys from straight men: | 736 |
| Surveys from bisexual men: | 132 |
| Surveys from none of the above: | 15 |
| Suveys from left-handers: | 131 |
| Surveys from right-handers: | 723 |
| Surveys from ambidextrous men: | 153 |
| Average Strokes To Cum: | 59 |
| Average Strokes To Cum - gay men: | 54 |
| Average Strokes To Cum - straight men: | 62 |
| Average Strokes To Cum - bisexual men: | 54 |
| Average Strokes To Cum - left-handers: | 58 |
| Average Strokes To Cum - straight men: | 60 |
| Average Strokes To Cum - ambidextrous: | 55 |
The shock news is that straight men last longer than gay men. Who would have thought it? Certainly not us (we don't think much about anything).
And left-handers have been edged out by right-handers in the effort to be the most long-lasting self-loving lotharios.
The Shootout Survey Results by Handedness
| Question | Left hander | Right hander | Ambidextrous | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Surveys | 131 | 723 | 153 | 1007 |
| Sexual preference | ||||
| Gay | 29 | 68 | 27 | 124 |
| Straight | 90 | 566 | 80 | 736 |
| Bi | 11 | 80 | 41 | 132 |
| Neither | 1 | 9 | 5 | 15 |
| Average strokes to come | ||||
| Strokes to come | 58 | 60 | 55 | 59 |
| Did you wank with your | ||||
| Wanked left-handed | 93 | 46 | 27 | 166 |
| Wanked right-handed | 29 | 600 | 37 | 666 |
| One, then other | 9 | 77 | 89 | 175 |
| What material did you use for 'inspiration' | ||||
| Pictures on a computer | 19 | 74 | 18 | 111 |
| Pictures in a magazine | 6 | 34 | 4 | 44 |
| Movie on DVD | 15 | 101 | 17 | 133 |
| Movie on video | 4 | 15 | 3 | 22 |
| Movie on computer | 28 | 156 | 25 | 209 |
| Just your imagination | 32 | 217 | 36 | 285 |
| A real live human being (and everything!) | 27 | 126 | 50 | 203 |
| Were you wanking... | ||||
| On your own | 96 | 590 | 83 | 769 |
| With a mate | 30 | 110 | 53 | 193 |
| In the round | 5 | 23 | 17 | 45 |
| What did you wank into? | ||||
| Your hand | 55 | 298 | 41 | 394 |
| An old sock | 11 | 49 | 13 | 73 |
| A handkerchief | 20 | 110 | 11 | 141 |
| The sink (bathroom) | 4 | 32 | 8 | 44 |
| The sink (kitchen) | 3 | 6 | 3 | 12 |
| The sink (neighbour's) | 3 | 12 | 18 | 33 |
| Plant pot | 6 | 25 | 12 | 43 |
| Not saying | 29 | 191 | 47 | 267 |
| Afterwards, did you have a feeling of... | ||||
| Intense joy | 107 | 589 | 110 | 806 |
| Inadequacy and gloom | 24 | 134 | 43 | 201 |
The Shootout Survey Results by Sexuality
| Question | Gay | Straight | Bi | Neither | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Surveys | 124 | 736 | 132 | 15 | 1007 |
| Handedness | |||||
| Left handers | 29 | 90 | 11 | 1 | 131 |
| Right handers | 68 | 566 | 80 | 9 | 723 |
| Ambidextrous | 27 | 80 | 41 | 5 | 153 |
| Average strokes to come | |||||
| Strokes to come | 54 | 62 | 54 | 41 | 59 |
| Did you wank with your | |||||
| Wanked left-handed | 24 | 125 | 16 | 1 | 166 |
| Wanked right-handed | 70 | 517 | 69 | 10 | 666 |
| One, then other | 30 | 94 | 47 | 4 | 175 |
| What material did you use for 'inspiration' | |||||
| Pictures on a computer | 19 | 72 | 17 | 3 | 111 |
| Pictures in a magazine | 5 | 31 | 8 | 0 | 44 |
| Movie on DVD | 24 | 92 | 15 | 2 | 133 |
| Movie on video | 2 | 17 | 3 | 0 | 22 |
| Movie on computer | 24 | 154 | 30 | 1 | 209 |
| Just your imagination | 29 | 215 | 36 | 5 | 285 |
| A real live human being (and everything!) | 21 | 155 | 23 | 4 | 203 |
| Were you wanking... | |||||
| On your own | 76 | 606 | 80 | 7 | 769 |
| With a mate | 41 | 105 | 42 | 5 | 193 |
| In the round | 7 | 25 | 10 | 3 | 45 |
| What did you wank into? | |||||
| Your hand | 56 | 283 | 50 | 5 | 394 |
| An old sock | 15 | 41 | 15 | 2 | 73 |
| A handkerchief | 4 | 125 | 12 | 0 | 141 |
| The sink (bathroom) | 5 | 31 | 7 | 1 | 44 |
| The sink (kitchen) | 2 | 7 | 2 | 1 | 12 |
| The sink (neighbour's) | 11 | 13 | 8 | 1 | 33 |
| Plant pot | 8 | 22 | 12 | 1 | 43 |
| Not saying | 23 | 214 | 26 | 4 | 267 |
| Afterwards, did you have a feeling of... | |||||
| Intense joy | 86 | 609 | 100 | 11 | 806 |
| Inadequacy and gloom | 38 | 127 | 32 | 4 | 201 |
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