• Bondage roles - are you a top or a bottom?

    Bondage roles - are you a top or a bottom?

    Do you like to be in control? Does your partner like to be obedient? Find out which bondage role suits you and your partner...


    Before using your new toys in a bondage situation, to begin with, you and your partner must first decide who's going to play the dominant role and who's going to play the submissive.

    It's extremely important for both of you to interchange and play both roles so you can both experience being in control of your shared sexual destiny, or indeed submitting yourself and trusting your partner explicitly. Quite simply, the dominant role will demonstrate skill and power and will control the submissive role.

    Men and women who are normally responsible for enforcing morality and standards in their jobs or home life are said to enjoy being the dominant partner. Conversely, those of you who have powerful jobs or tons of responsibility may like the feeling of being free from decision-making and being told what to do, so the submissive role will appeal to you.

    Spartacus Leather Collar - MasterAnother way to describe the dominant/submissive dynamic is 'tops' and 'bottoms'. In BDSM, the 'top' is the dominant partner who dishes out the spanking, bondage, clamping and whipping, and the 'bottom' is the submissive partner. However, bottoms can also be the more dominant partner by demanding the top to perform certain acts of their choosing and even insist on switching roles.

     

    Getting started with bondage


    The best way to begin with bondage is to practise tying each other up by following the safety instructions of the products you choose and experiment with how much constriction you both feel comfortable with. Keep switching roles so that you're both used to being tied up or performing the act.

     


    Sportsheets Ostrich Feather TicklerWhen you're both fully up to speed with that part, try bringing in some sexy play such as tickling feathers, massage oils and body paints before progressing to the next stage. We love the O Tickle Me Gift Set, Chocolate Body Paint Tube and the Amazing Hot Heart Massager.

    It's worth noting that in some circles bondage doesn't necessarily end in sexual climax, but we're assuming you guys will be thankful of a blinding orgasm after all your hard work, so read on!

    Once you're both comfortable with using oils and feathers, etc, to stimulate your erogenous zones during bondage, you can progress to sexual acts such as oral sex, masturbation and full sex. But why not add some S&M to your routine as well? Spanking during bondage sex is a sexy treat if your man is on the receiving end, while all you girls will love having your nipples clamped during some red-hot oral sex while tied up.

     

    Introduce bondage into your relationship


    Erotic Bondage - The Art of RopeThe best way to get clued up on bondage (after reading this article, of course) is to read Erotic Bondage - The Art of Rope, and then it's just down to experimenting and exploring your limits and desires as a couple. Just remember to talk things through before, during and after your session, take things slowly and easy to begin with and make sure you each experience being tied up.

     


    One of the most important things to agree on during any bondage or S&M session is a safety word, so that if things get too out of hand for either of you, just say this word and your partner has to stop what they are doing immediately. It can be a word unrelated to sex, such as 'Lamppost' or 'Twiglet' for example, just as long as you both agree that your chosen safety word means everything must stop until the situation has been resolved.

    With the trust of your partner and a safety word in place, you can test each other's sexual boundaries and discover new turn-ons you'd never have imagined.

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