• "Ask Birdie..." What Gift Can I Give a Girlfriend...Who Isn't Mine?

    Ask Birdie...

    Oh, Sex Toys. So tempting, but how do you know what to buy? What works? What doesn't? What is even OUT THERE to try? You have questions, I have answers (most of the time...)

    Ms. McBirdie,

    There is a little lady that I am interested in getting to know a little better. She has a b-day coming up and I am at a loss on what I should get her. Well, that is not true.

    She and I have had several conversations about the lack of affection she is receiving from her current and how she does not take the time for personal reflection. These conversations have lead me to think about getting her a massager.

    Would this be appropriate? And if so, which product would would you recommend?

    Thank you,

    Loving Touch

    Oh, Loving Touch. Let me say first off that I do not in any way recommend buying sex toys for someone who is in a serious relationship with someone other than yourself, if you have an interest in that person. You are just asking for some sort of mad Jerry Springer type show down. That warning goes double if she is complaining to you about her man. I see bloodshed in your future.

    However! If you are sure that there is a sound friendship between you and this lady and that she will take the gift in the spirit that you intend (which - again - should really not be the spirit of "look how cool I am, don't you want to leave your man for me"), then a personal massager can be a very fun, thoughtful gift, especially if it is for someone who doesn't always spend the time and money on herself.

    I would recommend that you stay far far away from any toy that screams out "I am for pleasuring a woman who is not getting enough sex!" - assume that she will be using this with her boyfriend, or that he will at least know that she is using it. This will eliminate Rabbit-esque type toys from your list of contenders. You should probably also avoid anything that is too obviously coupley. While a vibrating cock ring is a great couple's toy, it isn't a great toy if you're not part of the couple.

    I suggest you go with something cute, non-offensive, and clearly in the friend category. I love the I Rub My Penguin. I actually received this as a present from a man before he was my partner and it was perfect - sexy without being skeevy, adorable and useful.

    Similar toys would be the I Rub My Duckie or the I Rub My Fishie. Remember to keep to toys that have a look of innocence and fun to them, so that your friend vibes are clear. She may well realize that a man who buys her sex toys is a man she needs to consider dating, but you'll have to be very subtle if you don't want her boyfriend to use any gift you give her to beat you about the head and neck areas. Best of luck.

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